Baby Massage Secrets – Calm and Soothe a Fussy Baby

You’ve tried feeding, rocking, swaddling, white noise, and bouncing on the yoga ball at 2 a.m. But your baby is still fussy—and you’re both running on empty. Here’s something you might not have tried: baby massage.

Gentle, consistent baby massage can calm a fussy baby, support digestion, and help build a stronger bond between you and your little one. In this guide, we’ll walk you through the why, when, and how of baby massage, and show you simple techniques that can bring peace back into your home.

Why Baby Massage Works

Massage is more than just a calming touch—it’s a tool that taps into your baby’s biology. When you use moderate pressure with rhythmic, slow strokes, you stimulate the vagus nerve. This helps regulate digestion, lowers stress hormones like cortisol, and promotes relaxation, as described in this 2025 review on pediatric massage mechanisms.

Proven Benefits of Baby Massage

Infant massage doesn’t just relax your baby—it contributes to multiple areas of health and development. Here’s a more complete list of the evidence-based and experience-backed benefits:

• Relieves constipation and regulates the digestive system
• Eases colic and reduces gas buildup
• Improves sleep duration and quality
• Reduces teething pain, nasal congestion, and general discomfort
• Supports asthma symptom relief by relaxing chest muscles and easing breathing
• Stimulates blood and lymph circulation, aiding healing and toxin removal
• Improves muscle tone and flexibility
• Reduces eczema symptoms by calming irritated skin (when using safe, moisturizing oils)
• Stimulates the nervous system and promotes brain development
• Boosts the immune system, helping your baby fend off illness
• Enhances sensory awareness and body coordination
• Improves overall body awareness and motor skill development
• Promotes emotional bonding and attachment
• Increases oxytocin, the “love hormone,” in both baby and parent
• Strengthens self-image and emotional security from early, positive touch
• Improves communication, as massage allows babies to express and respond to non-verbal cues
• Provides soothing, skin-to-skin contact, especially helpful for premature or NICU babies

Why It’s Good for You Too

Massage also supports your own well-being and confidence as a parent. You’ll experience:

• Better emotional connection with your baby
• Increased confidence and competence in caring for your baby
• Lower stress and anxiety, thanks to the relaxing nature of touch
• Improved ability to understand baby’s cues and respond appropriately
• Support for postpartum depression through increased oxytocin release
• Lower blood pressure and heart rate, promoting your own relaxation
• Higher prolactin and oxytocin levels, which can enhance milk supply in breastfeeding mothers
• Stress relief if separated from your baby during the day
• Greater sense of well-being and purpose in caregiving roles
• Boosts confidence and bonding—even more so for first-time or young parents, supported by this mother-focused study

What You Need for Baby Massage

• A comfortably warm room with soft lighting
• A towel or soft blanket on a safe, flat surface (changing table, bed, floor)
• Optional: calm background music
• Natural, edible, unscented baby massage oil (like cold-pressed coconut, grapeseed, or sweet almond oil)
• Clean, warm hands with short fingernails and no jewelry

Tip: Keep a spare towel handy in case your baby pees or poops during massage. You can leave their diaper on if you prefer.

Always test any oil on a small patch of your baby’s skin first to check for irritation or allergies. Avoid mineral oils for baby massage.

When to Massage Your Baby

The ideal time? When your baby is calm but alert—maybe 30 to 45 minutes after a feed. Avoid massaging immediately after nursing, when your baby has a full belly.

Look for these Green-light Cues

• Open hands
• Steady gaze
• Relaxed limbs or soft reaching

When to Skip the Massage

• Has a fever, diarrhea, or skin rash (unless advised by your doctor)
• Seems stiff, arching their back, or crying
• Turns away or becomes overstimulated

Some parents prefer mornings; others make it part of the bathtime or bedtime routine. Follow your baby’s rhythm—your massage routine will be as unique as you and your baby.

5 Baby Massage Techniques That Calm Fussiness and Aid Digestion

These strokes are easy to learn and can make a huge difference in your baby’s comfort. Use slow, steady pressure, and talk softly or sing as you go. Keep sessions short (5–10 minutes) to start.

1. I Love U Tummy Baby Massage

Perfect for gas and colic relief.

• Use your fingertips to draw an upside-down “I” on the left side of baby’s belly (your right).
• Then draw an upside-down “L” across the belly from right to left.
• Finally, draw an upside-down “U,” going from the lower right side of the belly, up, across, and down the left.

This follows the path of the large intestine and helps release trapped gas.

2. Tummy Circles (Clockwise Strokes)

With flat fingers, make small clockwise circles around baby’s belly button. This mimics intestinal flow and can ease bloating.

3. Leg Rolls and Bicycle Kicks

Roll each leg gently between your hands, then bend both knees and gently push them toward the belly. Repeat a few times to help release lower gas.

4. Open Book Baby Massage

Place both hands at the center of baby’s chest. Glide them outward, as if smoothing pages of a book. Then gently stroke from shoulders down to hands.

5. Back Massage

Lay baby face-down across your lap. Using both hands, stroke from neck to bottom in long, gentle motions. Avoid the spine; focus on the muscles on either side.

Pro Tip: Use deep, gentle pressure. A light touch can feel ticklish or annoying to babies. You want to activate pressure receptors, not just brush the skin.

Reading Baby’s Cues: How to Know It’s Working

Infant massage should be a dialogue, not a one-way activity. If your baby softens their gaze, sighs, coos, or relaxes their limbs, you’re on the right track.

But if you see clenched fists, crying, back-arching, or twisting away—take a break. You can always try again later or shorten the session.

What If Massage Doesn’t Seem to Help?

Sometimes massage isn’t the magic bullet. That’s okay. Try pairing it with other calming techniques like:

• Skin-to-skin contact
• White noise or shushing
• Rocking or babywearing
• Warm baths

Also consider whether there might be an underlying issue like reflux, allergies, or a latch problem. Your pediatrician or lactation consultant can help.

How Infant Massage Supports Breastfeeding

The connection between breastfeeding and baby massage is powerful. When a baby is calm, they latch more easily and feed more efficiently. Massage can:

• Soothe pre-feed fussiness
• Help regulate sleep-wake patterns (so baby is alert for feeds)
• Relax your own nervous system, which boosts oxytocin—your milk release hormone
• Increase prolactin, which supports milk production

Some studies have shown that massage may even increase the frequency and duration of breastfeeding, especially in the early months.

“When my son was 6 weeks old, he would cry nonstop from 6 to 10 p.m. I tried EVERYTHING. A friend told me about baby massage. I started doing the tummy strokes after his evening feed, and within a few days, it was like a different baby. He still fussed sometimes, but it wasn’t hours of crying anymore. And honestly, it calmed me down too.” — Melissa, mom of two

Takeaway

Infant massage isn’t just a trend—it’s a time-tested way to calm, comfort, and connect. Whether you’re using it to ease gas after a feed, wind down before bed, or simply spend loving time with your baby, it’s worth trying.

Start slow. Follow your baby’s lead. And remember, even five minutes a day can make a world of difference—for both of you.

You’ve got this. And you’re doing great.

Further Resources

• Find a breastfeeding support group near you.
• Milkology Breastfeeding Class – Affordable, video-based online course to help you master breastfeeding at your own pace.

References

• Tedeschi, C. et al. (2025). Exploring Manual Interventions for Pediatric Health: A Scoping Review. MDPI.
• Sheidaei, A. et al. (2016). The Effect of Massage on Infantile Colic: A Systematic Review and Meta-analysis. PMC.
• Chen, Q. et al. (2024). Effects of Pediatric Massage on Developmental Outcomes: An Umbrella Review. ScienceDirect.
• Khuzaiyah, N. et al. (2022). Experiences of Mothers Participating in Infant Massage. BMC Nursing.
• Miller, C. et al. (2023). Oxytocin, Prolactin, and Breastfeeding Outcomes in Mothers Practicing Infant Massage. PMC.
• Sumantri, I. et al. (2025). Effect Of Infant Massage On Increasing The Duration And Frequency Of Breastfeeding. ResearchGate.
• Physio-Pedia. Effects of Infant Massage. physio-pedia.com.
• NCT. Baby Massage Tips and Benefits. nct.org.uk.
• IAIM. FAQs for Parents. iaim.net.